Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Ohhhh POOP.

Timeline: A couple nights ago
Location: The Marshall abode
The event: Bathtime

Dad: "Time to get ready for your bath Rebecca! Let's get you undressed!"

Rebecca strips down obediently, then runs off shrieking. She visits Mom who's feeding baby sister on Mom and Dad's bed. She gives Mom a big naked hug from behind. Very cute.

Dad returns to the bathroom to finish prepping the bath water.

Mom: "Rebecca peed on the floor in our bedroom!"

Dad goes in to discover that she not only peed on the floor, but all over (fortunately) Mom's side of the bed.

Dad shoos Rebecca out of the room, to give mom a chance to clean up. Rebecca runs off to the living room. Dad chases her down, finds her standing on the sofa.

Dad approaches Rebecca cautiously, not wanting to startle her into peeing all over the living room furniture.

Dad manages to scoop her up, carries her into her bedroom to fetch a towel.

Unidentified object: "Thunk"

Dad: "What was that?"

Dad looks down, to see a rabbit turd on the ground. Uh-oh.

Rebecca grins maniacally, holding up two handfuls of rabbit turds.

Dad wonders exactly how the poops got from Rebecca's bum, which is firmly enveloped by his left arm, into her hands, which were decidedly empty moments ago when he picked her up in the living room. Some things will be pondered later. It's time to deal with the situation. Dad runs to the washroom.

Dad: "Rebecca, can you throw those in the toilet please?"

Poops: "Plop, plop, plop, plop."

Dad: "Thank you, now it's time to wash our hands."

Mom: "USE THE HAND SANITIZER!"

Dad: "Here, lots of soap."

Dad finishes cleaning up Rebecca, scrubs his arm, retrieves the first poop from Rebecca's bedroom, scrubs the floor, and goes and investigates the living room floor. There is one more lonely poop on the floor by the sofa, fortunately not on the carpet. A quick check of the sofa pillows, the floor under the sofa, and of the carpet (patterned, better to disguise poops) reveals no obvious fecal stowaways. A little more floor scrubbing and order seems to be restored.

Dad gets into the now lukewarm bath with Rebecca, gets peed on three times, replaces the water twice, and a good time is had by all.

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