Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Becca's potty training saga: Tub turds

We are somewhere in the middle of potty training. No one knows how big the middle is... that's what's so intimidating about it. This isn't the standard police box I imagined.
Onwards, brave reader!
The hourly potty sit model has been abandoned in favour of something more reasonable for our lifestyle. Potty sits now happen when Rebecca wakes us up, just after breakfast, before or after lunch, before and after nap, before or after supper, and before bedtime. There are also potty sits before any car trips or outings, and any time I feel she might be prepared to "produce". Yesterday (day 3), was mostly successful pee-wise, but Rebecca did not poop all day long. Today, she pooped twice. Once, in her room - two rabbit turds "My Poops!", during "nap" time, which prompted her to open her door, poop in hand - and make it be known. The second time... well... imagine this...
an exhausted but dedicated youngish mother, recovering from the ravages of a cold, but hellbent on enjoying the remains of the day with her two beautiful daughters, sits on the bathroom floor garbed in mismatched but vomit-free clothes which are decidedly incompatible with the inclement weather. She is washing the hair of her eldest cherub, while also interacting with the chubby-cheeked baby strapped into a vibro chair. The bathing baboo is clearly revelling in the opportunity to play in the water. She splashes merrily in the bubble bath, playing with a plastic watering can, a wooden boat, a face cloth, and a blue terry octopus. If she stops smiling, it is only in order to concoct a vivid tale about a journey to visit the sea witch. The baby vomits at three second intervals with the vigor of one posessed by demonic powers - and yet, she too is happy as a clam. She bats at her toys, and bestows smiles on everyone - she is overjoyed to be in the company of two of her favourite people, and coos and babbles appropriately. At the end of a long day, this idyllic scene is just what the doctor ordered for a Mommy whose enthusiasm for potty training is beginning to wane.

Lucy: [baby sounds of happiness]
Becca: My poops!
Mommy: It's o.k., accidents happen. Time to get out of the water.
[a dozen poops appear on the surface of the bath water]
Becca: NOOOOOOO! AAAAAAAAAH!!! [splashing and thrashing, and attempts to make her body as inaccessible as possible - by lying down flat in the tub and squashing poops with her kicking legs]
Mommy: Rebecca, you're splashing Lucy! I'm going to count to three. I want you out of the water now!
Becca: NOOOOOOOOOOOO! My Poops!!!!!!!
Mommy: Rebecca, we need to get you out of the water - it's full of poop. It's dirty, it could make you sick.
Becca: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! [angry wailing]
Lucy: WAAAAH! WAAAAH! WAAAH! [translation: now I've decided that I'm upset, hungry AND tired]
Mommy: That's it!!! I'm taking you out of this tub NOW.

And they lived happily ever after.
And naked Rebecca sang the "I'm a big kid now" song from the potty training video, while Mommy wondered why these things always happen when Greg is at work.

1 comment:

Jen said...

If it makes you feel better, my sister and I did similar things, and we both figured out the toilet eventually.