Saturday, June 18, 2005

I want my drugs back

There are restrictions on the life of the pregnant woman. Of course, it seems that as soon as you are prohibited from certain items, you happen to need them more. There are three particular characteristics of being pregnant that are harder to deal with as a result:

1 - Sinus headaches and congestion (these are increased in pregnancy and I could go into all the mucous membrane details but I won't).
2 - Headaches as a result of hormonal flux (these are headaches in the head, unlike sinus headaches which are behind the eyes).
3 - Molten bitchiness (like lava! - of course, this doesn't happen too often, but I must admit that during last week's heat wave, I may have skirted the edges of unpleasantville).

Therefore, I bring you my list of the top ten things I can't have and wish I could:

1 - Sinus Tylenol!!! (see above - self-administered shiatsu headache massage doesn't always cut it).

2 - Advil!!! (because sometimes you need to break the cycle of pain with chemicals - and it doubles as a good headache killer).

3 - Caffeine! (Now that I'm extra tired all the time, it is very difficult between 2:30 and 3pm in the day, no matter how many hours of sleep I've been having all week, to stay conscious. I can't help but think that a big tea would help - not bloody tisane).

4 - Sushi (ah... in the summer it seems an extra appealing dinner option).

5 - Brie cheese (it's everywhere now that I can't eat it!)

6 - Peanuts (an excellent protein snack with some beneficial oils, I am banned from it during pregnancy because our baby is already predisposed to being allergic and while evidence is thin, there is a chance I could encourage a food allergy broader than my own).

7 - Sleeping in (my body won't let me for a variety of reasons).

8 - Alcohol (now, I'm not a big drinker, but I do like alcoholic cider. I find it very refreshing, as is the occasional daquiri during the summer. In Vancouver I had Grower's pear cider, which I decided was the best drink on earth. Of course, in Ontario, they only import the granny smith apple cider. In B.C. they have a bajillion fruit flavours. Then at the Superstore this week, I noticed the liquor store was carrying the peach cider and one of the berry ciders. I think it would have been worse if they had the pear, but it was bad enough.)

9 - A restricted number of people who look me over (now acquaintances, friends and family make not-so-subtle visual inspections of my body. If they were subtle, I could imagine it was not happening - but they aren't subtle. They do it before they even speak to me. I feel more objectified now than I did in skimpy summerwear).

10 - Energy. (I put this one last because I am assured that it returns with the second trimester).

There are also many things I enjoy about being pregnant, and new privileges I experience. The deferential and protective treatment from people I know is certainly fun most of the time. The mostly guilt free eating experience is also enjoyable. And of course, something like this only strengthens your relationship with your husband (especially if your husband is like mine, and was very keen on pregnancy in the first place).

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